She had about as much tact as a lumberjack swinging an axe in a china shop. “What the fuck is going on here?” she screamed at the mad axe man.
“Is she crazy?” Mark asked, wondering if he should run out there to save her.
“Of course she is!” Tom replied.
Neither of them had had to deal with this crazed man while Mark was out of town. Neither of them were chased by anything. It seemed the moment they were within proximity to each other, the insanity started again.
“He’s going to kill her.”
Tom picked up some more china. “If he doesn’t, she’s going to kill me.”
They did some good distraction, but Tom was right. She certainly wasn’t happy with them using her good china to do so.
Warning: if you meet a cable man named Jim, run. Run very fast.
Mark hadn’t believed that at first, but the more he thought about it the more sense it made. He texted his brother, too much of their youth a question. I didn’t send for a cable man, did you do something?
Tom texted back soon enough. Why would I send you a cable guy?
With a groan, Mark went to escape out the window, away from the man waiting at his front door with the name “Jim” on his vest.
Nobody actually understood what was happening, but Mark and Tom agreed that it was something worth running away from. Rather quickly.
Tom had long since stopped thinking that Mark was hiding the truth from him. After all, how could he continue to hide something like this? The axe man looked the same as he did when they were teenagers. Except now Tom was in his mid twenties and Mark coming on thirty. So it couldn’t be the same person.
He was doing the same thing though. Mark pulled him around a corner and they caught their breath.
“I swear,” Tom managed to say, “if I thought suit fitting was going to result in this, I’d probably have told you to get another best man.”
“Maybe we shouldn’t have been so early,” Mark replied.
Yeah, none of the others were going to believe this, that was for sure.
She had accidentally proposed to the wrong person.
I know the difference between Tom and Mark, she thought. Just as she knew it was Tom in front of her and not Mark. Tom stared at her blankly.
She cleared her throat. “I… from behind… why are you wearing Mark’s coat?”
“Why are you proposing to my brother?” asked Tom.
“That’s not an appropriate response.” She frowned, embarrassment gone. “Why are you wearing Mark’s coat? You ruined my surprise!”
“You proposed to him with his back turned to you?”
Yep, all embarrassment was gone. “It was a surprise! And none of your business how I do it!”
“Shouldn’t he be proposing to you?”
That was it. She scowled. “Why can’t I?”
Tom tapped a finger against his chin. “Because-”
Mark entered the room. “Tom, why are you wearing my shirt?”
It was time to figure out a way to keep Tom quiet.
Something about this was a bad idea, but looking back on the lumberjack chasing them through the forest, Mark figured it was too late to change his mind.
His little brother kept shooting a look at him. The sixteen year old didn’t have the breath to ask it, but Mark knew the question he wanted to ask was “why”.
“Don’t panic, I’ve got this under control,” he managed to wheeze out.
Tom didn’t look like he believed him. Mark dragged him around to the other side of a tree.
Taking a couple big gulps of air, Tom hit him in the arm. “Wh-”
They waited for the axe-armed man to run by their location. Yep, too late to change his mind. Holding Tom’s forearm, Mark turned them around back toward the cabin.
“Hey. Hey hey hey.”
“For God’s sake Mark,” his friend sighed. “What?”
“Don’t use His name in vain.” Despite saying that, it was obviously just a reaction, because Mark didn’t make any other motions that he had really been offended by his friend’s speech. “Look at this.”
He might have began to read the email, if Mark’s finger wasn’t covering the body of it. Instead, his eyes travelled up to the part of the screen he could still see.
“Father’s Day deals for the man who gave birth to you?”
Mark laughed. “Well, I’m sure there is a small pool of people that that could apply to, right?”
“Mark, stop reading junk mail.”