The one worse thing

“There is only one thing worse than sneezing,” he said.

His friend looked at him oddly. “Really? With all of the terrible things in the world, sneezing is up there? Only one thing worse? Is it murder? Or more abstract. Is it the potential for murder?”

Now that was awkward. He scratched at the tip of his nose. “I… was going to say hiccups. Hiccups are the worst thing in the world.”

“Oh definitely. Yeah, I’d rather be homeless.”

“You know, talking to you is always a barrel of laughs.”

The tendency for taking things too literally was at an all time high that day.